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Writer's pictureKayleen

I’m A Good Job

My little baby boy says this often. He recognizes his efforts and congratulates himself. For stuffing q-tips into a keyhole. For applying lotion to his hair. For filling his sandbox with potting soil. He says it in a way that repels any discipline or correction.


So in honor of this lesson, I want to say “I’m a good job” for taking care of two babies. For carrying and birthing one in a pandemic. For spending lots of days and nights alone with them, and making it through with a respectable amount of sanity in tact. For finding strength and energy to keep going when I really needed help or a break and couldn’t get one. For cleaning what I could clean. For taking the time to educate myself on what foods are healthy and for teaching myself new recipes that work for our family. For making a zillion meals everyday for everyone without expecting thank yous. For remembering to pray for my childeren and my husband. For putting up boundaries that protect myself and allow me to grow. For not giving up on my dreams. For defeating my demons that had me convinced that going after those dreams would ruin my family. For finally letting go of what my idea of what I thought my own parents should be like, and for trusting God that my comfort and guidance will come to me in a different way. For working out and healing old injuries. For doing the work on my brain to escape from old traps that told me the new me wouldn’t be as good as the old me. For finding the discipline to write, and write honestly. To reach out to old friends and for trying to make new ones, knowing that I was growing too isolated. For drinking more water. For washing my face and blow drying my hair on the days when I want to look good. For allowing myself to feel guiltless for wanting to look good. And for becoming a better listener- one who listens to hear and acknowledge not to wait for the opportunity to solve, fix or talk about myself.


I’m starting to think the lives we create are not rooms that we sit in, but they are tracks and roads and ladders and bridges that take us to a destination. They don’t need to be perfect. The infrastructure can be ragged and rough, but it still drives.


“Letter To My Baby” journaling guide coming this month! Available for purchase and instant download. You probably need it.

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